Old People Wisdom

(Originally posted 9/20/11)

Today I will attend the funeral of the father of one of my good friends. I’m not a fan of funerals and I hope I never meet anyone who is. The death of a parent is always devastating- I’ve been lucky so far that both of my parents are still alive and relatively healthy. But events like this always make me think about what will happen when their time comes. Truthfully, the resulting sadness and fear I feel is more about the reaction my children will have as they are very, very close to my parents. But I’m not going to dwell on that today, as Sue needs me to be there for her.

In any case, this post is a reminder to call your mom/dad/ assorted Loved ones and just say howdy. For no other reason, that because you still CAN.

20 Things My Dad Taught Me

The Big Ring is a wise man. Most of what he taught me stemmed from his own experiences and I’m sure he read the rest on the back of a t-shirt. But he passed it on and that’s what counts…

1. An honest days work for an honest days pay is nothing to be ashamed of.

2. Be the best you can be at whatever you choose to be. If you’re going to be a hooker, be the best damn hooker on the block.

3. Cooking bacon when you are naked will sting. But it won’t affect the taste of the bacon.

4. Admit when you are wrong. Then make it right.

5. Taking responsibility for your actions is the sign of being an adult.

6. It’s better to ask for help first, than to try and clean up a bigger mess later.

7. It’s always easier to start out with an ‘A’ and maintain it, rather than starting with a ‘C’ and trying to fix it. This applies to men AND report cards.

8. You can accomplish anything with family by your side.

9. Why do we fall? So we can practice getting up again. That’s the most important part of falling.

10. Give away only that which you can afford not to get back. This applies to both your money and your virginity.

11. Learn to love fiercely. It will make people appreciate your love all the more.

12. Very often in life, you will receive both more than what you bargained for and less than you deserve. Learn to work with both.

13. People will treat you the way you allow them to. Demand respect and you will receive it.

14. A person’s ego is often inversely proportionate to their actual ability to get the job done. This applies to both work and sex.

15. People support that which they helped create. Always involve others.

16. If the job needs to get done, it doesn’t matter who does it. This does not apply to sex with my daughter.

17. Charity is only charity if no reciprocation is expected. If you expect something in return, it’s business.

18. Your children will only be as happy as your marriage is. Make time for each other. You are the first and best example of what love and commitment are.

19. There are two sides to your hand when it comes to raising kids. The loving side and the learning side. Use the first side generously and the other side sparingly. Especially with my grandchildren.

20. You can’t tell someone you love them when they are dead. Well, you CAN. But chances are they won’t hear you.

I hope you never read it here, but I Love ya, Daddy. And thanks