Thai and Goodbye

So I met with Rick today. We agreed to rendezvous at a Thai restaurant that I chose, and things were doomed for the start.

I texted him when I left town to verify the location, and that’s when it started. He proceeded to text me every few minutes thereafter, even though I told him I was driving. I mean, WHO DOES THAT?! And not only did he continually text me (despite the fact that I didn’t respond), but he was texting me stupid shit.

He had been cracking wise about Kurt for the last few days and personally, I find that kinda immature. I get it- you’re competing with the dude, but there’s no need to disparage him. I kept telling him that Kurt ISN’T a bad guy, that he’s really quite nice even though he stood me up because of a work emergency. He still kept up with the needling- like I said, kinda immature.

The reason I didn’t walk away sooner is because he had other good qualities and I figured that maybe I was overreacting. After all, I couldn’t hear his voice or read his face, so there’s room for interpretation, right?

Wrong. He began his diatribe of jokes by mentioning Kurt. Coupled with the constant texting, I was annoyed even before I got to the restaurant.

When I arrived, he was walking to the door and I asked him if he wanted to hop in while I parked the car. He’s harmless, after all. And I was already there, so I might as well go through with things. It also didn’t escape me that if he hopped into the car, it would avoid the pending hug I was sure to get.

So he jumps into the car and I’m immediately hit with the scent of baby powder mixed with…something. I can’t place it, but I know I don’t like it.

Once we exited my car, I began walking toward the restaurant, even though under normal circumstances, I would have maybe stopped, smiled, hugged him and possibly given him a peck on the cheek.

I did none of those things.

I DID give him a perfunctory once-over and I wasn’t impressed with what I saw.

He had claimed to be 6’3, 215lbs. And while he was definitely tall, there’s no way he weighed 215. He was more like 185 or so. My thighs are thicker than his.

I do not like this.

He was also wearing weird eyeglasses, which I had never seen in any of the pics he had sent me. I’m not suggesting that he lied about his appearance (with regard to his face, anyway), but he just didn’t jive with the image I had placed in my head. This is not HIS fault, of course. It’s mine. I saw what I wanted to see, but there was one thing I couldn’t ignore: bad teeth. I hate bad teeth [shudders].

When it came time to order, he planned to get a small bowl of soup. That’s it. Just soup.

Dude, I just drove 90 minutes on an empty stomach, anticipating some kickass Thai food! I managed to convince him to share a shrimp dish (which was awesome, BTW). Apparently he doesn’t eat lunch. Like, EVER.

Well now I feel like a heifer.

The conversation proceeded to be good- we covered his divorce, our kids, hobbies, etc. He was both engaging and curious- always a good sign. But then came the weird jokes. This guy was cracking jokes about stuff we had discussed DAYS ago. Obscure stuff. I had to keep asking him, “What are you talking about?!”

Now it’s time to leave. He paid the bill (relax, it was less than $20), and we walked back to the parking structure. Here’s where I made my feelings known.

I stopped at HIS car and said my goodbyes. “Thanks for lunch, it was nice to finally meet you, drive home safely”.

He would have to be the world’s biggest idiot not to get it. And thankfully, he did. In fact, he didn’t even TRY to hug me or make a move. This tells me that HE wasn’t feeling it either.

What a relief, right?

Anyhoo…

The first person I texted when I hit the road was (you guessed it) THAT GUY. I hoped we could laugh about it, commiserate and maybe get some sympathy. Instead, he had a surprise for me. He had written an email that he intended to send me tomorrow.

Obviously my curious self asked him to send it today, and he did.

I read it on the way home, but I probably shouldn’t have. I starting bawling like a baby while trying to drive through fog and rain.

I am smart, S-M-R-T.

It seems THAT GUY feels that he needs some space from me. It hurts him to hear about the path my life is taking and he has to do what’s right for him. And he actually used the word ‘love’ TWICE.

Yes, TWICE.

I can’t blame him because I would feel the exact same way. Even worse, I would have hunted down every woman who winked his way and cut their hair while they slept. And that would be a mild response.

Once I got home, I replied and told him that I will respect his feelings and that I will always love him. The ball is in his court now, assuming he wants to continue playing, that is.

And yes, I do realize that it took ending the sexual relationship and seeking new partners, for THAT GUY to finally open up to me. But I’m not looking a gift horse in the mouth.

After replying to his email, I texted Rick the following message:

Nice, huh? He behaved like a total gentleman. I wish ALL men were that polite. It’s just another confirmation that he wasn’t seeing stars either.

I’m exhausted, y’all. I need to take a nap, but first I need to shower. I can still smell the baby powder. 🤢